How to Make the Most of Your Teen’s Time at Home During a Pandemic

You and your high school senior, soon-to-be college freshman, are hopefully well into the college admissions process by now. There’s a weird holding pattern this time of year as applications have been submitted and your student is waiting for decisions. Especially this year, there seems to be less going on to distract yourself from waiting and also so much going on at the same time. We don’t know what’s going to happen next week, let alone next semester or next August.

But this is the time where you’re supposed to be taking advantage of your senior’s time at home… doing all of those “lasts” and helping them begin the transition to college life! How do you do that when life looks so different?

Have Fun Together - While Being Productive

Does your almost college student know how to make the most basic of meals, or do their own laundry? Believe it or not, there is a fun way to teach this. Try calculating the number of weeks or months until your teen goes to college. Pick a topic or theme for each week or month and have a “lesson” that goes along with it. This could be making a new dorm-friendly meal or dessert they can share with their new friends, or tackling a new “Adulting 101” lesson each week, or learning new card or board games they could play in the dorm. Keep it light, make it silly. Print out a schedule and have your teen choose 50% of the activities. Make this your own and have fun with it!

Find Community

You probably have a lot of emotions thinking about your child going to college. Whether those feelings hit you yet or not, your family dynamic and relationships are about to change. It’s important that you find another adult - not your child - to share those feelings with. Especially in this “new normal,” having a sounding board of other parents who understand what you’re going through is vital.

Start Window Shopping Together

We’re in a pandemic and there is little to be excited about, especially when we don’t know what the future looks like. But online shopping and Pinterest is always there. No matter your teen’s interests, there’s got to be something they’re excited about for their future dorm room! Maybe it’s a bean bag chair for their late-night video game binges, or Pinterest-worthy curtains behind the lofted bed for an airy aesthetic. Whatever it is, start that wish list! Crowd around the computer and start dreaming about what a future dorm room or apartment could look like. This is a positive way to spend time together, and you might thank yourself six months from now when you really do have to start shopping (and you’ve already mentally prepared yourself).

Teach and Transition Finances and Organization

The last semester of high school is the perfect time to shift some aspects of your child’s finances and organization to them. This can include something as simple as homework reminders (you won’t be there in college!) or something more in depth like signing up for their first credit card.

Having an organizational strategy will be key in college. Whether your student prefers a printed calendar and pen, or utilizes a smartphone app like Asana or Google calendar, they should practice adding assignments in high school to make sure they like it.

Budgeting will also be necessary starting the moment you leave them at their dorm room. Use your time now to have the conversation about money. Some families give spending allowance to their students, and others require any spending money to be earned by their student. Whatever you choose, follow through with your agreement, and teach your teen how to keep to a budget and use their spending money wisely. If they are contributing to tuition, fees, or loans, craft an payment plan to keep them accountable.

Have the Hard Conversations

First, know that your student is probably scared and nervous, just like you are. In a normal time, as seniors enter their last semester of high school, the anxiety grows! Add a global pandemic, and it’s on a whole new level. Begin asking open-ended questions, like, “How can I support you right now?” and “What do you need from me?” More pointed questions might be, “What are you most excited about for next year?” and “How do you feel about moving away from home?” Remember to listen without judgement and allow them to process their feelings out loud.

Hard conversations also include those surrounding alcohol, drugs, and sex. If you’ve had the conversation before, this one is different. Ensure they know their resources and how to be safe, and that you’re always there when they need to talk or ask for help.

No Matter What...

This is a tough transition for both you and your child. It’s most important that your child knows you are there to support them and that you have fun with these last eight months at home. It feels like a long time, but the spring semester will fly by, and then it’s summer. Make time for fun, learning, listening, and growing your relationship.